Wednesday, October 27, 2010

why to people live in sorrow why do they have to live in fear for all the children of tomorrow we'll be stronger way is clear bring that beat back

Left my Rook notebook at home (again). Damn. The earliest possible chance I could get it is over veteran's day weekend, and that's IF I allow my family or boyfriend to root around in various notebooks to find out which one. Which I don't feel like doing. SO that means I don't get it until thanksgiving! XD

I've compiled all of the demons and their powers that I can remember/came up with recently on EverNote, which is an amazing program. Only being the idiot that I am, I downloaded it too early and subsequently, my free trial will run out on October 31st. Damn. I'll probably get another month's worth on my own and then try to con someone into getting me a year's worth, but it's a great program. *w* Me likey.

Just typing this made me recall a couple of demons though... Or just one. XD I'm pretty sure I've at least gotten the ones that are mentioned in The Rook and the new ones that'll appear in The Ram... PLANNING. THIS IS HOW YOU DON'T DO IT, GUYS.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

well i've never had to knock on wood but i know someone who has

[[Tuesday AGAIN! This is important and spoiler-ish. X3 This is post-Rook Tuesday.]]

1. What is your full name? Do you have a nickname?
Tuesday Leonora Olson. James and Anna call me Day sometimes.

2. How old are you? When is your birthday?
I am twenty-two years old now... My birthday is September 18th.

3. Where were you born? Where do you live now? Are you patriotic?
I was born in Arkansas, but now I live in Seattle. I don't think I'm very patriotic. I don't wave flags or anything. I hardly even find the time to watch fireworks on the fourth...

4. Who are/were your parents? (Names, occupations, personalities, etc.)
My mother was a librarian. My father had a couple jobs... Their names were Thad and Anita Olson. Mom was, well, like a librarian--pretty quiet, loved books and reading, very loving but firm. But she was very smart and could tell you anything about any book ever. She was the best. Dad was quiet, too, but more solemn than bookish. He was very much a business man, but that's not to say he didn't have his silly moments. He loved playing with our dog. He had the most handsome smile...

5. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?
I was an only child.

6. What is your occupation?
Um... I work at a book store, and I suppose I'm a writer... *sigh*

7. How tall are you? How much do you weigh?
5'6, 148 pounds...

8. What color is your hair? What color are your eyes?
I have very dark brown hair, and very dark brown eyes. I think they've gotten darker recently...

9. What is your race?
I'm human.

10. To which social class do you belong?
I feel like a college student again, although I suppose my income puts me in the middle class. I'm still making a bit off of my book, Mr. Fallun wants to make a movie, and I have pay from the book store. And the Ram's income...

11. Do you consider yourself to be attractive? Do others?
Not really. I know I've gained weight and I wear baggy clothes on purpose. I don't know what others thing. The Rook doesn't find me very attractive, that's for sure.

12. What is your style of dress?
Long skirts, the loose kind that fan out. Baggy sweaters and long-sleeves. Neutral, natural colors. I still like blues and greens...

13. Do you have any scars? Tattoos? Birthmarks? Other unique physical features?
I have a couple of scars, the most recent one on my wrist from wringing that charm bracelet around it so many times...

14. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?
I have some mild allergies to furry mammals. But not much else.

15. Are you right- or left-handed?
Right-handed.

16. What does your voice sound like?
Quiet. Very, very quiet. I-I sort of have a stutter now, too, because of those stupid demons...

17. What kind of vocabulary do you use?
I'm not sure. A large one? A well-educated one? A reading one?

18. List three quirks or other defining characteristics.
I still wear lots of mascara and eyeliner. I like dark lashes. Um, let's see... I fidget a lot. Mostly it's touching my hair, but I also play with my bracelet. I hum to myself just before I fall asleep.

19. How often do you bathe? Do you wear perfumes?
Every evening I take a shower, early enough so I have time to dry my hair before I go to bed. I don't wear actual perfume, but I like to wear body spray. Usually something like sweet pea. I like the more natural scents instead of those flowery or fruity ones.

20. What kind of facial expression do you commonly wear (dour glare, wry smile, etc)?
Lately... I have a habit of frowning nervously or biting my lip. It might be my makeup, but I also seem to have wide eyes, like I'm scared all the time. Of course, that might not be too far off...

21. Do you use body language? How?
I keep eye contact with the Rook and Ram, but I look down or away for humans, I think. I fret with my fingers when I'm in public, or with the bottom hem of my shirt.

22. Do you have a commonly used saying?
I don't believe I do.

CHILDHOOD

23. What is your earliest memory?
A bed time story with my parents.

24. How much schooling have you had? Did you enjoy it?
I had a year of college and completed high school. I mildly enjoyed it, but I haven't been able to muster up the energy to go back to finish it.

25. Where did you learn most of your knowledge and skill?
Life experiences and books.

26. How would you describe your childhood in general?
So very happy. My family was so warm and safe and happy...

27. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
A storyteller, or a librarian like my mother.

28. When and with whom was your first kiss?
It was in grade school or middle school, with a boy by the name of Bobby Fitz.

29. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?
...I am not. I lost it to Chris during senior year.

30. Do you have a notorious or celebrated ancestor? Does that affect you?
I don't, so it doesn't.

INFLUENCES

31. What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?
...The island events. Important doesn't necessarily mean good...

32. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
I don't know. Getting into college, even if I didn't complete it.

33. What is your greatest regret?
...what happened on the island...

34. What is the most embarrassing or shameful thing ever to happen to you?
That time of the month in the asylum...

35. Do you have any secrets? If so, what are they?
I-I tried to keep the island a secret. I keep the truth secret.

36. What is the most evil thing you have ever done?
...

37. When was the time you were the most frightened?
The night when the Rook followed me into the asylum and I realized that he was real.

38. Have you ever traveled outside of your country? If so, to where?
I've been to Italy and Canada.

BELIEFS

39. What is your alignment?
I'm an atheist.

40. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?
Pessimistic, I'm afraid. I've been through too much to be otherwise.

41. Do you believe in a god? If so, which one and why?
I don't, not anymore. If He existed, He wouldn't have let any of this happen.

42. Do you believe in an afterlife?
Hell is where I'm going, I'm fairly certain.

43. What is your greatest fear?
Hell, but probably not in the sense you're thinking of...

44. What makes you angry? Sad? Happy? Why?
My life, for the most part, haha... When people treat that damned book so frivolously or say they enjoyed it, that makes me angry. Or perhaps frustrated is the better word? Frustrated and aggressive. When I recall certain memories, particularly my parents, they make me sad... Not much makes me happy anymore, but a good book will. So will polite customers who don't recognize me.

45. Do you think people are basically good or basically evil?
Yes.

46. What are your views on politics?
They're messy and I stay out of them now.

47. What are your views on gambling, lying, theft, and killing?
They're all wrong.

48. How far will you go to defend your beliefs?
To the death.

49. How much do you value money?
I value it as far as it gets me in life.

50. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?
Take away someone's loved ones.

51. Do you believe in self-sacrifice for the greater good?
Yes.

52. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?
I want to, and I may have once, but not anymore. Not since Chris left my life.

53. Are you superstitious?
Not really.

54. How much do you respect the beliefs and opinions of others?
I respect them as much as they respect mine.

55. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings?
I am honest with my feelings, but usually not my thoughts.

56. Do you have any biases or prejudices?
I'm biased against all of the petty little humans running around, ignorant of what could be hunting them. They're so lucky and so damn stupid.

DEALING WITH OTHERS

57. Who is the most important person in your life, and why?
I'm not sure. Probably Mr. Fallun.

58. Who is the person you respect the most? Despise the most? Why?
I despise the Rook and the Ram and the rest of their kind! They're horrible, monstrous creatures who should kill each other off and get the hell away from me!

59. Do you have a significant other? Who? Why?
Not anymore. In a way, I guess I'm still getting over Chris.

60. Do you have a lot of friends? Who is your best friend?
Not anymore. I'm friendly with my coworkers, and some of them seem to like me, but we never hang out or anything.

61. How do you relate to members of the same race? Class? Sex?
I'm definitely better with humans than demons. Also better with females than males.

62. How do you relate to members of a different race? Class? Sex?
...Stiffly at best.

63. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened.
I was in love with Chris, but after the incident of the island, and after seeing him once in the asylum... Never again.

64. What do you look for in a potential lover?
I'm not looking, because the Rook would only end up taking him away from me. I'm not going to do that to anyone else.

65. How close are you to your family?
...They're dead.

66. Do you want a marriage, family, and/or children?
I did, I really did. But now, I'm not sure...

67. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?
I'm an avoider. It's so much easier to avoid fighting with the Rook and not get hit for it, and it's spilled over into the rest of my life, too.

68. Are you a listener or a talker?
I'm a listener. I'm quiet.

69. How long does it usually take for you to trust others?
I'm not sure I can anymore.

70. Do you hold grudges?
Not anymore. They're petty and stupid.

71. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?
I don't like to, but I'd like to think I'm still able to...

72. Do you like interacting with large groups of people?
Not at all.

73. How well do you express yourself?
I've been struggling with it more and more ever since the Ram came into my life.

74. How quickly do you judge others?
Instantaneously, but only little judgments.

75. Do you care what others think of you?
Not very much.

76. Do you have any enemies? How or why are they your enemy?
The demon populace at large... They're terrible monsters!

PERSONAL TASTE AND OPINIONS

77. What is your favorite pastime? Color? Food? Possession?
I still like reading, and working is actually fun. My favorite color is indigo, since it's cool and dark and very pretty. My favorite food is anything chinese or asian.

78. What are your preferences in arts and/or entertainment?
I generally stay away from horror, and I'm a sucker for romantic things...

79. Do you smoke, drink, go whoring, or use drugs? Why or why not?
Never. I've done enough stupid things in my life without adding to the list.

80. How do you spend a typical Saturday night?
Working, getting groceries, or curled up and watching television.

81. What is your most cherished fantasy?
...changing the past. I just want to go back to how things were. I want him back.

82. How long is your attention span?
Long. I'm very patient.

83. Do you laugh a lot? What do you find funny?
Not anymore. Although I do find dry humor (like british things) funny.

84. Is there anything that shocks or offends you? If so, what?
The Rook. The violence in the world. What even humans are capable of.

85. How do you deal with stress?
I'll read alone, listen to some light music. Or I'll leave the house, since the Rook and Ram are usually around.

86. How much athletic ability do you have? Artistic?
I don't have much of either of those...

87. Do you like animals? Do you like children?
I love them both.

88. Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?
I prefer plans, mostly due to the Rook's tendency to be spontaneous.

89. Do you have a pet? If so, what is his/her name? Species? Fur color? Etc…
I did as a child, but not anymore. The Rook would kill it. Unless he counts...

SELF-IMAGE

90. What is your greatest strength as a person? Weakness?
I've gotten more and more stable, back to being even. But sometimes, the little things pile up and once they do, I'm utterly useless. Once I break down, I'm out.

91. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
My past.

92. Are you generally introverted or extroverted?
Introverted, unfortunately.

93. Do you like yourself?
Not anymore. I'm working on that, though. My therapist says I have to get my self-esteem back up.

94. Do you have a daily routine? How do you feel if your day is interrupted?
I do, but since interruptions are fairly standard, they don't bother me as much as they once did. Stuff happens.

95. What goal do you most want to accomplish in the next six months? Your lifetime?
In the next six months, I would like to survive with my sanity still intact. I'd like to get rid of the demons before I die...

96. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 20 years?
I don't even plan that far ahead anymore...

97. If you could choose, how would you want to die?
Content with life!

98. What is the one thing you would like to be remembered for after your death?
Nothing, hopefully.

99. What three words would you use to best describe your personality?
Gloomy, submissive, skittish.

100. What three words would others probably use to describe you?
Shy, independent, airheaded? I'm not sure. It would depend on who you ask.

101. Why are you risking your life to adventure?
Because living with the Rook as a poltergeist is risking my life. I didn't ask for this. Lord knows I didn't.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

curtain goes up and the lights come down wanna see the new look gotta hear the new sound

Herpaderp, no update for Pedestal tomorrow. Didn't get the chapter done, not even half done. ._. Plus I want all of the last race chapters to be double length to go through it quicker, so yeah...

I'm also very keenly stuck on WHIPLASH!. This is terribly annoying because I really really really want to work on it a bit more before November rolls around, but the words won't come. I know what I want to happen, I know roughly what the rest of the chapter should be, but it's just... not coming. Ugh.

I'd also like to get chapter three of The Ram done by November so I can start a new chapter/document for NaNo. But Stephen, that little ass, isn't cooperating. Neither is Tuesday. And the Ram only wants to beat on the Rook. idek what the Rook's up to these days.

Note to self: Get something done of WHIPLASH! first. Then finish The Ram chapter. Then spend the rest of the month churning out excess Pedestal.

Friday, October 08, 2010

i've been here before a few times and i'm quite aware we're dying

So since I'll be in the state's only big city this weekend, I'm going to be going out shopping! Exciting, right, but you may be asking what this has to do with writing. Well!

Apparently, a new nanowrimo trend is to get an article of clothing/outfit for each of your main characters and to wear it when you feel inspired for them/want to feel inspired for them! This sounds terribly fun, so I decided I'm gonna give it a try. :D I have no idea how many characters I'm gonna get stuff for, but I plan at least three.

Tuesday = baggy sweater, I'm thinking dark blue or green or purple.
The Ram = turtleneck! Haha, no, seriously.
Stephen = hipster clothes! Probably some shirt (+maybe a scarf?) with some hipster-esque design on it. I sorta already have the glasses.

Optional characters, if I could find the right clothes for:

The Rook = I know his exact outfit, but somehow, I doubt I'll find it. If I could find some sort of maroon long-sleeved shirt, though, perhaps.
The Owl = a blue dress, which I highly doubt I'll find, much less buy. But hey! If I find it, I'll go for it.
The Mockingbird = Some sort of brown or black hoodie... I'm not entirely sure. But if I saw it, I'm sure I'd pick it up.

I may just do this for other characters, too. XD Just because it sounds really fun and it'd be like a giant inside joke with yourself and your characters. Nathan and Sonya would be hella fun, too... And I have wanted to make a Pedestal shirt or two... HMM.

Saturday, October 02, 2010

my voice drowns deep underground only the dead can hear me see me

Well, the new NaNoWriMo site is up and running, and I'm already perusing its forum. XD And updating my profile, etc. I'm mad because I had typed up an awesome synopsis for The Ram on there, completely forgetting about the site wipe, and then came back to no synopsis. D:

November's going to be fun. XD My roommate is more or less used to the creepy-ass music at midnight (she loooooves silent hill), but I have a new guy since last November, and he's kinda scared of it. He also said he's not going to visit me, aww. D: Probably for the best, though... More writing time. And less creepiness he gets to see from his girlfriend.

I'm also going to go to a write-in or meeting or something if it kills me. Especially since we evidently have TWO MLs for east river this year! (as opposed to none the year before, and one for the entire state the year before) Yeah boyyyyy. It'd be even awesomer if I could get some USD students to be NaNoers, or find the ones who already are. (I know there are others, damn it! DX I just don't know who they are...)

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